Altar Call – Opelika-Auburn News
Dog stories are like blue sky on a dreary
me from living in a world without good dog stories. I will walk a mile to hear
a good story about a dog. To be honest, I am suspicious of people who do not
enjoy dog stories. A good dog story can break in upon a dreary day like blue
sky pushing dark clouds aside.
have forgotten the source of the story about the talking dog that was for sale.
I just know that whoever sent it to me is high on my list of dear friends.
you talk?” the man asks the dog.
do,” the dog replies.
what is your story?”
dog looks up and says, “Well, I discovered my gift of talking when I was very
young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift. In no
time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies
and world leaders. No one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of
their most valuable spies for eight years.
you quit the CIA?” the man asked.
the dog replied. “Jetting around the world tired me out. I was not getting any
younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a job at the airport to
do undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening
in. I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of
dog continued, “To make a long story short, I found a sweet wife, had a mess of
puppies, and retired a few months ago.”
man listening to the dog is very amazed. He cannot believe what he has heard.
He goes back to the front porch and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.
owner says, “Ten dollars.”
dollars! Man, your dog is amazing. Why on earth are you willing to sell him so
he is a liar,” the owner says. “He didn’t do any of that stuff he told you
story shared with me recently is the one about a Baptist dog. I think my friend
Steve dreamed this one up, but I don’t have proof that he did it. I would never
do anything to embarrass the pastor of First Baptist Church, so I am reluctant
to give him credit for it until he owns up to it.
seems that this Baptist preacher and his wife decided to get a new dog. Ever
mindful of the congregation, they knew the dog must also be a Baptist. They
visited kennel after kennel in search of the right dog. Finally they found a
kennel whose owner assured them he had just the dog they wanted. The owner
brought the dog in to meet the pastor and his wife.
the Bible,” he commanded. The dog leaped to the bookshelf, scrutinized the
books, located the Bible, and brought it to the owner.
find Psalm 23,” he commanded. The dog dropped the Bible to the floor and,
showing marvelous dexterity with his paws, leafed through the Bible, and soon
pointed to Psalm 23 with his paw.
pastor and his wife were so impressed that they purchased the dog and took him
home. That evening a group of church members dropped by for a visit. The pastor
and his wife began to show off the dog, having him locate several Bible verses.
visitors were amazed. One man asked, “Can he do regular dog tricks too?”
have not tried any of those yet,” the pastor replied, “but I will now.”
the pastor commanded. The dog immediately jumped on a chair, placed one paw on
the pastor’s forehead and began to howl.
pastor looked at his wife in shock and gasped, “Good Lord! He is a
friend George Mathison told me a great dog story. Next week I will share
George’s dog story with you. In the meantime, have fun. Go out tonight, howl at
the moon, and let your dog wonder what on earth you are doing. If your dog
starts howling with you, then you will know you have a regular old dog. If the
dog shakes his head and walks away mumbling, you know you have a dog that could
get a job with the CIA. + + + +